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Over time Andriote came to understand that his choice, each and every day, to take the powerful medication he needs to stay healthy, to stay alive, came from his own resilience. When and how had he become resilient? He searched his journals for answers in his own life story. The reporter then set out to learn more about resilience. Drawing from leading-edge research and nearly one hundred original interviews, the book makes it abundantly clear: most gay men are astonishingly resilient.
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Andriote deftly weaves together research data and lived experience to show that supporting gay men's resilience is the key to helping them avoid the snares that await too many who lack the emotional tools they need to face the traumas that disproportionately afflict gay men, including childhood sexual abuse, substance abuse, risky sexual behavior, depression, and suicide. He frames pivotal moments in recent history as manifestations of gay men's resilience, from the years of secrecy and subversion before the 1969 Stonewall riots through the coming of age, heartbreak, and politically emboldening AIDS years and pushing onward to legal marriage equality.Īndriote writes with searing honesty about the choices and forces that brought him to his own 'before-and-after' moment, teasing out what he learned along the way about resilience, surviving, and thriving. We go inside individuals' hearts and groups' missions to see a community that works, plays, and even prays together.Īndriote gives us an inside look at family relationships that support resilient sons, the nation's largest organizations' efforts to build on the resilience of marginalized LGBTQ youth, drag houses, and community centers.